i had a conversation with someone in my last semester about the relative merits of remaining with my current job, earning a state employee’s wage (which this person equated to a sort of voluntary carrboro hippie stoicism) versus pursuing the financial and material perks that come from earning a corporate RTP premium (which this person probably equated with real normal adult life).

money is very definitely the primary “reason” that most people work. either to pay bills from month to month, to pursue material wealth for show, status, and comfort (read: being a good american), or to move up in the salary hierarchy compared to neighbors and coworkers. none of these are wrong per se, and most everyone feels one or all of those things at one point or another.

but it bothers me that i might inadvertently fall into one of these states, that i don’t really have any plan (yet) to work towards or measure my progress.

working is something everyone pretty much takes for granted. but recently i’ve started cogitating on it, especially in terms of what it is that motivates me to work.

i started back when i was in my second year at unc because i was bored, frustrated that i had no responsibility when it came to classes and assignments. voluntarily choosing to work for a few hours a week was the yang to school’s yin. it gave me an alternative to studying and homework. but it was also a step towards independence and greater freedom from financial obligation to my parents.

earning money doing things what were either easy for me or fun seemed almost a travesty. seemed like stealing. but having a little bit of no-strings attached money was nice. increased my freedom in our commercial society.

but if the reason i worked in the past was school-avoidance, and now school–all six years of it–is over, then i wonder, “why do i work?”

of course i couldn’t photograph my new office until i had my diplomas framed and up on the wall. which necessitated a total office makeover.

in order to get everything into the photo, i had to splice three images together, hence the multicolor walls behind my desk carpet smudges.

also, i added a picture of my office flora to a previous post.

so i have this window in my new office, gets lots of afternoon sun, i thought: time for an office plant. stopped by lowe’s the other day, had no idea what i was doing. i was starting to convince myself that a 6 foot maple would make a terrific officemate before i discovered that the “indoor” plants were kept indoors.

there were some neat looking houseplants, in particular the desert rose and the rubber plant (Ficus elastica), but i was looking for something a bit more…boring. something i wouldn’t have any guilt about killing.

the first (and only?) high light lover i came upon was an ivy plant. seemed like a hardy, not-too-exotic species for starters. and something i might actually notice growing.

what amazes me is that i’ve had the plants (i got five little ones in a windowbox) in the office for a few days, and i think everyone who comes in recognizes them as ivies.

what i don’t love is this moist soil smell that my office has now taken on.

a whole week and nothing to blog? shame on me.

i spent a lot of time nursing my sick baby back to health (as the comments to this post will attest). suffice it to say, my laptop is almost feeling better than new (and i’m exhausted). i also got the new wireless-g cable gateway, which replaces my cable modem and wireless access point/router (in case anyone is interested in picking them up real cheap).

i’ve also been applying for the job i currently have, in hopes of becoming an actual permanent employee of the state of north carolina. guess i wasn’t lying on my in-state residency forms two years ago. go figure.

i’m enjoying the post-masters paper freedom, maybe a little too much (marchionini still hasn’t gotten back to me and jason’s already practically famous). i was excited to just “go to a movie” tonight, i enjoyed drinking with coworkers and friends last night, and i had the loveliest time making morningstar burgers with jane afterwards. tomorrow night is happy hour, friday we have off for resurrection weekend so meg and co. are gonna be grillin out and playing tennis. saturday dance party at hell. am i back in the game?! am i back in the game?!

i think so.